


Merry & Pippin's Relief

by epkitty



Category: Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Limericks, M/M, Multi, Ridiculous
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-03-07
Updated: 2011-03-07
Packaged: 2017-10-16 04:08:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/168251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/epkitty/pseuds/epkitty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There once were some hobbits from Shire</p>
            </blockquote>





	Merry & Pippin's Relief

There once were some hobbits from Shire  
Who were in a situation quite dire  
Randy as a rabbit  
An inconvenient habit  
For at night they were not at all tired

To Frodo and Sam they went  
But found the pair quite content  
Curled up in bed  
Sam gave Frodo head  
And said to the cousins, “Get bent”

So to Legolas they went for relief  
But he’d already found a hole for his beef  
Gimli, Gloin’s son  
Had tons of fun  
Much to Merry and Pip’s disbelief

They passed the wizard right by  
Though they knew he was not shy  
Their standards were low  
But to Gandalf they’d not go  
Not with two scruffy men quite near by

Aragorn that night was on watch  
And they marched right up to his crotch  
His face did not twitch  
“I’m Elrond’s bitch”  
And it was clear he was not one to debauch

On Boromir they’d next try their charms  
And he woke with sudden alarm  
They bent to his ear  
Their whispers quite clear  
The warrior smiled and opened his arms

The hobbits were soon to discover  
That the man was a talented lover  
After much exercise deep  
They all fell asleep  
And slumbered together under cover

The moral of the story is this:  
Just because you’re continually dismissed  
Don’t give up hope  
Don’t whine or mope  
Just keep on the man and insist!


End file.
